Touching Rules

My body belongs to me.

No touching if I don't want it.

No one should make me share my private parts.

No one should make me touch their private parts.

No one is allowed to touch my private parts.

Any secret touching is NOT okay!

  • Exceptions to the touching rules are health care, hygiene, and safety, although not if it’s presented as a secret.

  • If someone breaks the touching rules, go to a safe and trusted adult for help.

  • If something gives me the "uh-oh" or “icky” feeling, go to a safe and trusted adult for help.

  • You can say “no” if you feel scared, confused or unsure.

Tips for Talking with Your Child:

  • Talk about touching in the context of safety. Talk about family rules about touching the same way you talk about rules about fire (i.e.: don’t play with matches) or crossing the street (i.e.: Look both ways). Children understand the importance of rules. Talks about touching should be ongoing. This should NOT be a one-time conversation.

  • Talk about some examples when it would be ok for an adult to touch a child’s private body parts: to keep a child clean and healthy. i.e., doctor visits, bathing younger children, toileting etc. Remind them that even these should not be presented or kept as secrets.

  • Teach your child the correct names of their private body parts and make sure it is a name that adults will recognize as private parts.

  • Initiate this conversation; don’t wait for your child to ask.

  • Take advantage of “natural opportunities to teach.” Children have normal curiosity about bodies and reproduction and what they hear on the news or television. You can include talking about touching safety when you answer these questions.

  • Encourage your child to ask if he or she has any question or concerns about touching.

  • You may not always be available for your child to talk to about questions or concerns. Ask he or she to identify AT LEAST THREE other safe and trusted adults to talk to if these question or concerns should come up.

  • Be approachable; have your child practice saying, “No, stop that now.” Play “what if...” games.